Would You Resign From Life If You Had A Choice?

You can resign from your job, but it will be suicide to resign from life.

Dear Life,

I didn’t ask to be strong, but being born in poverty, a fight for life began at birth. I had to fight for everything that I needed. I had an impatient life, so puberty passed me by. I had to grow up faster than the speed of light. You demand that I do. I am glad it did because of the emotional, mental, and psychological damage it has done to many teenagers I know; I don’t regret it not coming my way.

I was an adult trapped in a child’s body, so you became my teacher. I was forced to make adult decisions at a young age without adequate knowledge and experience. You taught me that if I want kindness, love, understanding, patience, and all of the good things, I must give them. So, I gave, and I gave, and I gave until I almost went insane.

I wanted to resign from being kind.

Ninety-eight percent of the humans I gave to, with all my good intentions, actions, choices, and decisions, meant nothing to them. You showed me that being kind to some people is like watering a dead plant. No matter how much water you pour on some plants, they will never grow. No matter how much kindness I showed to some humans, it had no positive impact on their hearts, lives, actions, choices, or decisions.

You and I watered many dead plants. By checking my water bills monthly, I had to use common sense and set boundaries to reduce my water bill.

I demand from you, “Was all of my kindness a mistake?”

I am from the Rock, so I survived that painful episode. I wanted forgiveness, so I gave it and walked away. I still wanted to resign.

You said I should do unto others as I would have them do unto me.

I obeyed you. The humans I am good at put knives in my back and ropes around my neck, and many are families and friends, too. Quick thinking and common sense became my weapon to save myself.

You showed me that my guard was down when friends and family were around, so that’s the price I paid for being me. In my culture, if you are kind, then you are a sucker.

I am from the rock, so I forgive and move on.

I wanted success, so I obeyed your method. I worked hard, putting in the time, energy, and effort. I sacrificed my own life and sanity. I created enemies and lost friends. The road became lonely. I lived by the golden rule. I achieved the level of success that gave me respect. I had a husband, a house, boys and girls, and dogs and cats. I didn’t want a car.

The cats were my neighbors; I fed them, and they took shortcuts through my yard, slept on my verandah, and hunted the rats that feasted on my sweetsop and mangoes. They keep my yard free of lizards and rats. I claim them. I feed the street dogs, and they protect my property. I claim them too. Lol

With success, everyone wants my secret. I shared, becoming the go-to person for relationships, financial, child-rearing, and health issues, as well as my stories, my art, and anything else they needed. I give, and give, and give. I get no thought or consideration from most of the humans in my life. In my culture, if you are wealthy, you are expected to give and help everyone. No one gives to the rich here. You know that.

I am not rich. I incorporate creativity and innovation into my life’s actions, choices, and decisions. What I’ve learned from you, combined with the people I know, helped me make sensible, common-sense life decisions, giving me the life I want. Humans began to punish me for my success.

I am from the rock, and I knew you and karma. I forgive and live.

I was ready to relax and enjoy life.

You began to punish me for my success as well.

I did everything I was supposed to do, and now I can’t live the life I want. Then why did I do it?”

Life said, grinning as if he got a joke from Dave Chappelle, “You have achieved success, so another fight must begin to maintain and keep it. What, you taught the fight ends when you achieve success?”

“What!” my instincts demand. “You mean I can’t relax and just live how I want to?”

“Of course, you can,” Life teased. “But one stupid mistake, and you will be back where you started.”

My memory races back to my hungry days of poverty. I know where I will end up if I’m foolish, and I don’t want to go back there. But life hurts because I worked for the life I want, and now I can’t live it without its consequences.

“Why?” I demand in tears. “I did all of what was expected of me by God, you, religion, karma, love, kindness, etc, and now I must keep fighting to stay afloat. A desolate place where some died trying to reach. Many didn’t, and few managed to stay, but not without a cost. I must be paying for the rest of my life?

This question is asked by every human many times in life. I did all of what was expected of me; I did all of the right things, and I still lost.

Does anyone win?

Life answered, “Everyone wins, and everyone loses. But winning and losing are different for all of us. No actions, choices, and decisions are without consequences.”

“What should I do?” I asked Life.

“Go back into your life, the answer is there,” Life reminds me.

Searching my life, quitting isn’t one of my choices. I can’t resign.

Sorry, Vocal, but quitting or resigning means death to me. Yes, many times, all the good we do returns to bite us in the wrong places, forcing us to demand from life what we are good at, but it means nothing to those who take it. Quitting or resigning for me means going back to poverty, pain, hunger, hopelessness, no dreams, nothing good.

I don’t quit. The fight ends in death.

Quitting or resigning means death. I know life; I don’t know death. I don’t squit or resign from life.

I am from the Rock.

#Iintend2survive

If your heart could speak, what would it say?

I know life, I don’t know death. I refuse to resign from life!

A Prompt from Vocal inspired this.

Thank you for reading this piece. I hope you enjoyed it.